It definitely DOES matter.
Are you seriously saying that these women have the same trauma as they would have had if they had been raped instead of shown a penis?
Or is your argument that the level of trauma, dictates the level of someone's crime?
Your mental gymnastics are that 'even though he did not do it, he should still be called that, because that's the level he is at, according to the women'.
Again, these are not rape victims.
Sexual Assault is a reach, but even if it was, it is by far not on par with rape.
The way you're equalizing these obviously not-rape cases with actual rape cases, diminishes the hurt the real rape victims endure.
You don't see that yourself?